Bendigo Hoons – Top of The Fuck Head List Again…

…and still bottom of the gene pool.

Well, it’s not really news is it? Bendigo is again honoured with the prestigious accolade of being the state’s Hoon Capital! A label loved by many and one set to remain for the foreseable future, or at least until genetic manipulation becomes legal/acceptable.

If you’d like to read the article, try here.

What motivates these fuck heads? I mean, if dicing with death is something that substitutes Viagra for these homosexuals, why not simply shoot up an Ice/Crack/random semen cocktail once in a while? That way, you get the rush you crave while never really knowing whether you are going to die a horrible death or not but should it be the former, and we can live in hope, you only ruin the lives of your family.

I cherish the moment one of these Neanderthal toss pots crosses my path or puts my children at risk.

Of course, being of little intelligence, they often bemoan the ‘personal vendetta’ carried out by the local police force in the pursuit of their deemed innocent high jinks, rather than targeting paedophiles, murderers and well, any other criminal activity than theirs. Bendigo Police receive precious little praise for their work against Bendigo’s botty-boys who use hooning as a cover.

Read an article about Bendigo’s Traffic Management Unit here.

One dick-less wonder in particular seems not to understand that his actions have consequences. Poor Joshua Shelton lost his arm as the result of his misguided passion for hooning and while I wouldn’t endorse such radical and extreme body modification, especially for someone who seemingly enjoys driving, it doesn’t appear to have quashed his appetite for the socially repulsive activity. Donkey bollocks Joshua was caught twice in just 90 minutes, having already lost his license! Numb-nuts Josh is THE most effective argument for genetic manipulation if ever there was one.

Read about silly Joshua Shelton from Bendigo here.

Incidentally, this really gets my goat and, just between you and me, I don’t even own a goat! The social misfits, fortunate enough to harm themselves while hooning, are even eligible for compensation payouts from the Transport Accident Commission!

Even if they were deemed negligent and ultimately responsible for an incident, most were still entitled to a lump-sum impairment benefit, she said.

Read more on this insanity here.

I will give intelligent readers one guess as to who pays these dim-witted dick-nibblers? Hoons can obviously have several but I suggest you right in for the answer because you’ll be here forever otherwise.

Vultures with wheels

….and you know what? I bet nobody else gives a shit! But that’s the beauty of a blog; I can write what the hell I like and libel laws aside, I will argue that point to the grave.

I don’t know what’s worse, these tossers (see below) for their inability to park correctly or me for actually giving a shit!

Every fucker used the PEDESTRIAN walkway as their own private parking space
Every fucker used the PEDESTRIAN walkway as their own private parking space
A neighbour passed away a little while ago and the scavengers were present in numbers to pick the bones of his estate. They showed scant respect for anyone else by obstructing the public footpath, preventing pedestrians from walking safely and by parking on resident’s lawns too! How inconsiderate can you get? Not much in my opinion. Does the ‘fair go’ laid back attitude extend so far as to allow neanderthals to act in such a manner?
I could almost accept parking like this from a woman
I could almost accept parking like this from a woman

Navigating a busy street with a push chair and four additional small ones is far from easy at the best of times but when you are forced into the road, instead of the relative safety of the sidewalk, it can be particularly dangerous. My children have no choice but to ride or walk in the road. Are you so fucking thoughtless that you simply park where you feel is ok for you? In a residential area? The mind boggles at the thoughtlessness of, it has to be said, the overwhelming majority of vultures who drove to scavage the leftovers.

Thankfully our suburban road is relatively peaceful and traffic free, other than the obvious aforementioned morons but their ignorant actions speak volumes for the laid back ‘fair go’ attitudes, synonimous with Aussies. If we were located on a more busy public road, the baseball bat would be getting up close and personal with a couple of dick head’s cages.

Aussie ‘fair go’ attitude? More like Aussie ‘couldn’t give a toss’ attitude.